Every relationship has its ups, downs and moments of complete chaos. This doesn't have to be every day. Nor is it necessary for every disagreement to turn into a disaster. You can learn how to disagree with your partner
without flaring up an argument.
To learn how to disagree with your partner without flaring up an argument, you simply have to master a few rules of the road. Disagreements are natural. They're healthy, and they are perfectly OK in a relationship.
If we all thought the same way all the time and never disagreed, the world would be a pretty darn boring place!
How can you learn to disagree with your partner without flaring up an argument? Try following these rules of the road before driving into your next disagreement:
Avoid disagreeing for the sake of doing so.
Everyone has days where they just feel like being argumentative. Your partner does not deserve to take the brunt of this.
Stop before entering a fray and decide if you truly want to disagree on the topic at hand or if you're just trying to pick a fight.
Take a "mood" reading.
If the disagreement point is a "hot topic" and your partner's mood isn't the highest at that moment, it might be best to wait to broach the subject for a time.
Disagreeing when a temper is already hot can be a very bad idea. This doesn't mean you have to give up on the discussion; just time it more appropriately.
Think about what you're going to say.
Before opening your mouth to disagree, carefully think out the point you wish to make. Make sure you're using a clear line of thinking and that you can support your case.
Speak clearly but not with anger.
Make your point calmly, clearly and concisely. If you want to learn how to disagree with your partner without flaring up an argument, your tone will matter. Just state your case and explain your reasons.
Take care in the words you choose to use, as well. Avoid accusations and "discuss" rather than preach or lecture.
If you want to learn more about good communication between you and the opposite sex, check out this free video presentation on how to have chemistry with the opposite sex:
Listen to the response.
Rather than assume a defensive posture, try to carefully listen to your partner's side of the disagreement. You may find that your partner has some very good points to raise.
Your mind might be changed as a result, or if you state your case calmly and clearly, your partner's stand might change.
Remember, an adult "disagreement" is actually a conversation with give and take - or it should be.
Stick to the topic.
When you really want to learn how to disagree with your partner without flaring up an argument, sticking to the topic is a must. Toss in four other cases where you disagree and your partner might feel backed into a
corner. Then tempers can flare, and you'll both regret it. Adult communication is a give and take.
Be willing to compromise.
While this isn't always possible, sometimes compromise is the best solution. Once you both state your cases, you might just find some middle ground.
Agree to disagree.
Sometimes you find that a happy agreement or compromise just isn't possible. This is still perfectly OK in a healthy relationship.
Agree to disagree and move on from the topic. It's just a fact of life that people don't typically see eye-to-eye on every single issue.
Let the subject go.
Once you've reached a conclusion on the disagreement, let it go. There's no need to rehash it 10 times if both of you have stated your cases and decided on a compromise or just to agree to disagree.
Learning how to disagree with your partner without flaring up an argument is more than possible. Practice calm delivery of your point, remain calm, be willing to compromise or even fail at changing your partner's mind
and you can have healthy disagreements and exchanges that help both of you grow.
I hope you enjoyed this newsletter.
Until next time,